I heart Beth and Val

Obviously, May was not a great month for me, blogging-wise. And June is shaping up to be much the same. But I'm going to get it together, I swear. So let's get right to it. Beth and Val are my new internet obsession. They are video bloggers, and they are so, so funny. They do an occasional vlog called "TV is the Answer" at Television Without Pity, plus "Ask Anything with Beth and Val" at DotComedy. In addition, they also apparently work for Chiller? I'm not sure what they do with that, since I don't get that channel. (How I wish I did, though, because I love horror movies.) Anyway, they just riff on whatever cultural phenomena that strikes their fancy, using a viewer question as the jumping-off point. They're both very funny and attractive, but I am desperately in love with Val. Her wit is seriously sharp. Such a turn-on. One of my favorite vlogs was "How will you keep Jerry Falwell's memory alive?" Their take on super-lesbian Jackie Warner and "Work Out" is really amusing too. But almost all of them are pretty damn great. I couldn't figure out how to embed those, so here's another one that's also quite funny and lesbian-related. (Val is on the left, Beth on the right.)

Top 5 reasons the writers' strike needs to end

1. Tina Fey/30 Rock

"Four-thousand-dollar ham napkin." If you're a 30 Rock-aholic like me, you know what I'm talking about. Just one of the countless funny moments in your typical episode. I can't bear the thought of going months before seeing a new episode. Sigh.

2. Sarah Shahi

Thanks to Life, Sarah Shahi is cementing herself as my No. 2 all-time TV girlfriend (behind, of course, the patron saint of this blog -- Simone Lahbib). Life isn't TV cop show brilliance on the level of The Wire, but it's pretty damn good. It's captured my interest enough that I'd really like to see how this season plays out. Plus, Sarah Shahi is hotter than words. She's doing a nice job with her character. If Life doesn't last, I hope Shahi can parlay it into other interesting roles.

3. Yvonne Strahovski
OK, I am a Chuck fangirl. I love that goofy little show so much. It defies logic. Yvonne Strahovski is a total babe, her CIA cover is a crappy job at a place called Wienerlicious — what's not to love? Apparently there are several Chuck episodes still in the can, so I don't have to mourn its absence just yet. Yay!

4. Jenna Fischer

Ah, Pam. If Pam Beesly worked in my office, I'd be as love-struck as Jim. I love a funny girl. Pam is not nearly as bleak these days as she is in the above photo, since she and Jim finally got together. But that picture seemed appropriate, since the last time we saw a new episode of The Office was NOVEMBER 15TH. For heaven's sake, stop the madness. Pay the writers.

5. Sara Ramirez

I'm not all that into Grey's Anatomy this season (the writing has been seriously pissing me off), but Sara Ramirez is positively delicious. Thank goodness her character, Dr. Callie Torres, has become kick-ass again. For a while she was kind of a pathetic sad sack, which was no fun to watch at all. Although it's clear to me the show is not going to go this direction, in my mind, Dr. Torres and Dr. Hahn are having a secret, hot affair. What? Everyone else in that hospital sleeps together. Why not those two?

Becki Newton is bringing the funny

She's fabulous, she's hilarious, she's bitchy, and when under duress, she has a weakness for candy and carbs. She's Ugly Betty's Amanda Tanen, played brilliantly by the beautiful and talented Becki Newton. On a lesser show, Amanda would be all mean girl and no heart. But on Ugly Betty, she's ... well, mostly mean girl. But we also get to see a lot of the vulnerable Amanda, and Newton is just as good at that stuff as she is at the comedy. Her facial expressions slay me every week. Favorite quotes: "Have you been smoking one of your ponchos?" and (when Betty's dad offers Amanda a delicious flan) "Ohhh, BRING IT!" Favorite moment: I just can't pick one. But I do love this clip I found on YouTube, because when this episode originally aired, I was at least halfway into it before I figured out that Becki Newton was playing the nerdy Bizarro Amanda (aka Ruthie). So funny.

She's cute even when she shills

Stuck at home with a serious case of hay fever this week, I've been watching a lot of tennis. A lot. And I was getting really tired of the John McEnroe American Express commercial ("Klaus Umlaut? '85 US Open?") But yesterday, a new commercial joined the rotation -- Tina Fey plugging American Express. Like Tina herself, the ad is funny, cute and smart. As soon as I can find a video (update: here), I'll link to it, but the gist is that Tina has to do everything herself and is constantly solving problems ("I will suck the venom out, but this is the last time!"). Except when she has a credit card issue -- why, American Express will take care of that for you, goshdarn it!

I have had a crush on Tina Fey for a long time. I used to think I was alone in that, but in recent years I've discovered that she seems to be universally loved by the lesbians. It's not just because she's sexy and witty and liberal and wears those awesome glasses; I think it's also because we look at her and think, "Ah, that one shoulda been a lesbian." But she's not, and we're OK with that. And she seems to be OK with being the object of our affections. In one of the funniest 30 Rock episodes of the first season, she gets set up on a date with a woman because her boss (Alec Baldwin) assumed she was a lesbian (based on her choice of footwear). Anyway, everyone should watch 30 Rock, because it's hilarious. It has filled the void left in my life after Arrested Development went off the air. The season two premiere is Oct. 4. So far away! In the meantime, here is a funny clip from the show.